Depression can be a four letter words these days. In a world where positivity, intention, and manifestation are seen as the gateway to heaven, depression appears as the grim reaper, ready to take us down. No one wants to admit they’re depressed. When friends or family call, we say, “we’re in a funk”, or “just having a day.” But the truth is, we may be having a series of “days”. Days we don’t feel like getting out of bed. Days we don’t want to talk to anyone. Days where our highest hope is a little of the heaviness will lift so we can breathe. These are hard days.
I want to preface this by saying I’m not speaking of clinical or chemical depression. Anyone dealing with depression on that level, I’d strongly encourage to seek outside help as a valuable resource. What I’m speaking of here is that low grade depression where you can still put on a happy face and go about your business but feel empty inside.
This type of depression can come as situational or internal (meaning, you’re not quite sure why you’re feeling depressed since it can’t be attributed to something outside of you). You may wake up one week fine, then the next long for nothing but to sit and stare out a window. Yes, you can still function. Yes, you can paste on a smile for the public. But inside, you’re struggling to conjure up enough energy to move this body that now feels as if it’s adopted an additional 200 pounds.
This type of depression is not about endings. It’s about healing. Depression is the 4th step before final acceptance in the grieving process. Grieving is about releasing the old so the new can enter. A Course of Love reminds us that depression is “the final surrender that is necessary for the final acceptance to come into being.”
What prolongs the depression is our desire to not be with it. We minimize it, want it go away, or tell ourselves we shouldn’t be feeling it and it will never end. We are afraid to be with depression because of exactly that- we are afraid it will bring us down and we’ll never get up again. When in actuality the opposite is true.
Very often, I must remind my coaching clients that as we grow, we are most likely going to face depression. And some of it will feel scary for that reason – the fear we’ve regressed and will remain stuck. But no. The depression is there because you are growing. As we expand vibrationally, more light desires to enter our bodies. And any place our bodies are still housing past wounds and hurts will be brought to light to be healed. But depression needs our cooperation. It can’t heal unless we take an active part in its healing. Here are 4 steps to help overcome and heal depression.
4 Steps to Overcome and Heal Depression
- First you must acknowledge a part of you feels depressed and make time for it. Don’t minimize it or try to cover it up with food, alcohol, or busyness. It needs your attention, that’s why it’s coming on so strong in the first place. It’s tugging at your sleeve like a little child saying, “Help.” It’s important to set aside quiet time for yourself in a safe and nurturing environment, such as nature. Nature carries the frequency of healing, which is often why we feel better out in nature. If you can’t be outside, look out a window or at a picture of nature and beauty while you sit in a place that feels safe for you. (Note: It’s important you get out of bed. Staying in bed won’t allow for you to be with your depression. More likely, you will just get overwhelmed by it.) The thing we’re looking for here is that little bit of relief. I know for myself, when I finally made the time and space to sit after months of waking up crying and trying to push on with my work, I felt tremendous relief. A deep sigh escaped my lungs, and my body said, “Thank you.”
- Get to the heart of the matter. While you’re in your safe, nurturing spot, get out a pen and paper and write a letter to God, the Universe, the Creator, or whatever Higher Power works for you. Tell this Power all that is going on inside of you – your fears, your sadness, your worries, your apathy. BE COMPLETELY HONEST. Honesty, when told from a vulnerable place, softens the heart and begins to open us. In my own journals, when I’ve gotten honest and told what my heart really desired at that moment, often it was simply peace. That created the softening needed.
- Affirm the Truth. When we are feeling that heavy sadness, our minds will want to project all kind of lies such as, “I’m screwing up”, “This will never go away”, “Everyone else is happy, why not me.” It’s important we remind ourselves of what is true. The words can be from a spiritual text or mentor, whatever feels good in your body. Anything that brings a little lift of hope represents the truth because the truth is always lighter in our body. (Note: You can find out more about my book of prayers and affirmations, Remembering, here.)
- Be patient. Listen to the sounds around you. Let your eyes absorb the beauty you see. Lose yourself and let the mental mind rest while you drift above the clouds of your circumstances and breathe. Then be patient. It may not come right away, but as A Course in Miracles says, “You cannot call on the Holy Spirit in vain.” Peace will come. Give it time and give yourself permission to let go.
Try these other helpful articles: