There comes a time when we just can’t give anymore. We’ve done all we can think of, exhausted ourselves with information, swirled in our minds all the possibilities, looking for the “right answer”, the “right path”, only to find ourselves banging our head against the wall (or the computer, or the education system, or our boss).
We’re tired, mentally drained, and physically, can barely keep our eyes open long enough to stir cream into our coffees. This is the point we throw in the towel, and tell the Universe,
“I quit. This one’s yours.”
It may not be the most eloquent prayer, but it’s one of the most powerful ones. The world may tell you that you’re not being “proactive”, you’re giving in too soon, or you’re just “stuck” because of some unconscious belief you are having.
Maybe… and maybe not.
When we say the prayer (no matter what the words) of surrender, we’ve actually activated a very powerful force on our behalf. This force is not the force of self- will, the tenacious pit-bull, human part of us that says, “No,no! I can make this happen!” That part, though strong and determined, cannot keep running on its own momentum- eventually, it dies out.
If you have to “make” something happen, then perhaps it wasn’t meant to happen in the first place. Or it was, but not in quite this way or at this time. You may have gotten what you wanted, but at what cost to you, to your life force? And what were the results?
Wouldn’t it have been easier if you have followed flow, instead of force?
There is a difference between force and flow. Force happens because an idea gets stuck in our head, and we start slamming our shoulder against a door in an effort to force it open. Flow happens when we find ourselves walking through a door that magically appears, and we’re in awe.
We may have been heading toward that door already. More than likely, we were because we’d internally done the work that got us walking in that direction in the first place. But with flow, we aren’t hurried, we aren’t attached to the outcome of opening this particular door, we just decided to try it. Often, the door shows up on our way to another door, all on its own.
And that’s the difference. If it’s the right door, it will open easily. There may be some effort, but the effort we put in is motivated by a genuine desire in our hearts, in our values, in who we are. If we find it scary, it’s because the act of stepping out in our true nature is scary, not because we fear the result if we don’t act.
When “getting” is our motivation, we’re forcing.
When doing something because we know if we don’t, we will have disappointed ourselves, our Spirit- that’s flow.
Your Higher Self knows how to lead you to your greatest potential with the least effort and greatest authenticity. It’s what feels solid or “right”. Notice I didn’t say easy. Sometimes that takes effort, whether it’s to write a book, raise a child, or move. But in the end, it’s what your heart wanted to do. The act was the motivation, not the result.
And if, for today, there’s a part of you that believes if you just “tried harder” you could make it happen, ask yourself instead, “what, really, does my heart want here?” A nap? To spend some time with my children? To go to a movie or visit friends?
Whatever it is, that is your next step. It’s the thing that brings relief.
Isn’t happiness about enjoying our life? And if we spend all of our life energy forcing our way through to some end, then what have we really achieved besides aging ourselves? Eckert Tolle says in his book The New Earth, “if there is no joy in the means, there is no joy in the end.”
So today, look for the joy in the means. It’s the only time you have, literally.
And don’t forget to utter those sacred word, “I quit!”